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Personal Finance – Keeping up with the Joneses

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Personal finance is something that we care about here at Mint. Learn more with great personal finance tips in our blog article index.

We came across this blog post by David at MyTwoDollars right about the time we were launching our new SpendSpace feature last month. SpendSpace allows you to compare your spending, in any category, to city, state and national averages. Check it out (it’s located at the bottom of your Spending Trends page)… but be forewarned that it’s highly addictive.

As we were designing this feature, we gave a lot of thought to whether or not we should all be apsiring to “keep up with the Joneses”. David’s take on this was insightful, and we wanted to share it with you.

Everyone has heard the expression “Keeping up with the Joneses”. In fact, I have used it on MyTwoDollars quite a few times. But I started giving it some thought and I started to realize that most of us, on purpose or on accident, try to keep up with the Joneses we see on television and in magazines, and not the real Joneses that are living next door to us.

The reason I think that is because if we truly had an inside look into our neighbors affairs, we would see that they are probably just like us… they probably own the same kind of cars, the same kind of appliances, they have done the same kind of remodeling that we would do. After all, they live in our neighborhood, so they are probably very similar to us. So when we feel like we don’t have as much as our neighbors or we need newer stuff to feel more accepted by society, I think we are judging our lives by the fake ones we see on our favorite television shows and not by the reality surrounding us.

Look around your block or neighborhood; is everyone else driving a BMW while you are driving a Toyota Yaris? Does everyone else have a much nicer house than you do? Do they get to take more vacations than you? Chances are, they aren’t and they don’t. They are making things work just like you are, and some of them might have a few more things than you do, and some of them might not. But really, they are probably very similar.

I think this is important to keep in mind as we are inundated with advertising proclaiming to deliver the good life if only we bought that new Mercedes, took this new drug, bought that new house in the hills. The people on TV look and act different than we do because they are different than we are…they are actors, on a television show or in an ad, trying to either entertain you and/or sell you something. Truthfully we don’t need a new washer and dryer if our existing one still works fine. But I guarantee they can make you think you need a new one because of how white their shirts are! The Joneses you might be trying to keep up with are not real Joneses, because those real Joneses are just like you.

Just something to give some thought to before you feel like people have better stuff than you, more stuff than you, are more successful than you. Take a minute to check out your true surroundings, and not the fake ones created on television. I think you will find that most everyone around is just like you, and there is no one you need to be keeping up with. It’s never a good idea to try to keep up with people anyway; it’s much more important to carve your own way, make up your own mind as to what is important in life and not let others dictate what you should or should not be doing. But it’s especially important to not let advertising or television fool you into a false sense of what you aren’t or what you should be.

You can see more of David’s writing on personal finance topics on his blog at MyTwoDollars.com.

7 Comments so far

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  1. This is good advice regarding personal spending. I think this is one of the biggest reasons people drive cars they cannot afford. I have quite a few articles about how to buy a used car at my website . Check it out!

  2. It may be worth noting that this stuff is not new. TVs shows in the 50s were no more accurate about showing off “middle-income life”. Most TV shows just suck out by glossing over the whole concept of money and only making an issue of it when it makes for a good plot twist.

    Look at the Brady Bunch, Mr Brady is an Architect, with a wife and 7 kids. Sure he’s making a little above average salary, but he’s got 8 dependents! The more recent Step-by-Step also featured a blended family of 6 children. She’s a beautician, he’s a contractor (read labourer). And yet, neither of these families seems to have any “money issues”. I can remember watching Step-by-Step on TGIF (at like 13 or 14) and asking why they didn’t seem to have any money problems. And barring a some big life insurance settlement (everyone’s a widower), they just gloss over the rest of the details.

    The typical sitcom or serial is based wholly on “suspension of disbelief”. They don’t want you to question if this reality is even possible, they just want to show photogenic people who make us laugh and then forget about the rest.

    MyTwoDollars hits it right on if we truly had an inside look into our neighbors affairs, we would see that they are probably just like us. I make 75k USD / year (and benefits) and I rent a 2 bedroom apartment. I don’t own a car and I just signed up for a pre-paid cell phone b/c I couldn’t even justify the minimum $30/month plan. I don’t own a big screen TV or a 5.1 surround sound system or a cool new MacBook Pro. I don’t have any kids or major outstanding debt and I make in the top 27% of household incomes, by myself. Of course, I have a bunch of cash in the bank (and invested), that’s how I get ahead. That way I can eat well and pay for my gym pass and still have a bunch of money left over at the end of the month.

    When I was making 50k, living on my own, I didn’t have a car then either, but I socked away 5k, guess where that came from?

    That should give most people something to think about.

  3. Even if your neighbours do have a nicer car than you take more holidays a year than you etc the chances are that it’s not because they can afford more, it’s more than likely because it’s on credit.

  4. James R. Malovrh

    Great article… Every now and then we all need to stop and think just like that article suggests …. More recent years its “Just Keeping Up” forget the Joneses !

  5. In life, I’ve tried to keep up with the Joneses in many ways, but never in regards to personal finance. I don’t care if I ride the bus to work, eat at home every night, or save a ton from retirement while everyone else is spending away. I have created a personal finance website for 20 somethings that talks about frugality, personal budgeting, and choosing the right investment vehicles, and being smart with your money. You can check it out at 20somethingfinance.com.

  6. “Keeping up with the jones” can be emotionally draining. I worked with my life coach Kyle Langseth (www.developyourdestiny.com) and we discussed a relevant concept of Financial Self Worth. For me that meant how much money or income I felt I’m worth. I feel dissonance in my emotions when my income is different than my financial self worth. Kyle suggested for some people it goes as far as to shed excess money beyond what feels “normal” to the person. It offers an explanation to why lottery winners will spend every cent they get or when some people get a new higher paying job and go further into debt rather than paying it off. It has nothing to do with right or wrong, it just feels normal to them to shed excess money or be broke when bills come due. It is easy to caluculate what your financial self worth is already at. According to Jon Assaraf “take the average of you last three years income” If you start to earn more than that number he suggest making efforts to train your brain that more is the new normal. Take a look at VP Gates post again and listen to the language that reveals how “normal” it is for him to save money and choose against a $30/month cell phone contract. Even though he makes more than 73% of Americans, I would argue Gates also feels worth his income.

  7. my question is why not use credit, life is short.

    good question eh?

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